A Plea...

OK - the nights are closing in around us rapidly; it is now dark when I walk out of the office at 5.30. It is also not particularly bright first thing in the morning, and is going to carry on getting darker. So, I have a plea towards all users of the roads...
*DISCLAIMER* I am a pedestrian and a motorist, but not a cyclist...

Pedestrians
Yes, your long black coat looks really rather nifty. Very gothic / Blade, and I'm sure that it also keeps you very dry. However, when you have the hood up, and you are wearing black, you become a little shadow moving through the night. Not very visisble. Please do not step out into the road without looking, even if it is raining, and you don't want to get your face wet. Especially if it is raining! And, to be perfectly honest, with the orange city lights, pretty much *any* colour either gets washed out into the surrounding light colour, or darkened to black. Scarily, it is actually quite difficult to see you if you are wearing white! In order to ensure that you are visible, it would be nice if you could wear something reflective; arm bands or high vis vests, (and yes, I practice what I preach - I wear both...), or a light attached to an arm. Use designated crossings if they are available (zebra / traffic lights etc) - even if it means walking an extra twenty paces. It might help stop a driver having a heart attack as they test their brakes to destruction!

Cyclists
A lot of what I've said for pedestrians also applies to you. If you have a black bike, you are dressed all in black, and you don't have lights on your bike (as the cyclist we saw on the way back from the cinema last week), then you are asking to have an accident! *PLEASE* put lights on your bike (it is the law (number 60)), and please also be aware that flashing lights actually make it harder for someone who is coming towards you to judge your speed, and therefore how far away you are. Steady lights in addition to flashing ones are so much better.
At this point, I would also normally put in a rant about how it is also against the law to cycle on the pavement unless it is a marked cycle lane (number 64), however, I do also know that Bristol is not a safe place for cyclists - the cycle lanes are small, and often disappear! But, if you are going to use the pavement, all of the above rules apply - make sure you are visible, wear lights, and give way to pedestrians - the pavement is for them, not you! Also, if you are old enough to cycle on the road, you are old enough to obey the laws of the road. This includes stopping at red lights and zebra crossings (I am talking to YOU - the lady who thought the red light wasn't for her, and knocked an elderly gentleman in front of me flying) - a little thought is all it takes!

Motorists (Cars, Vans, Lorries, Motorbikes etc).
OK - regardless of what I have put above, there are still idiots out there who are determined to commit suicide, and go out into the black night dressed all in black, they don't look when they cross the road, and they walk on and off the pavements because they don't understand that they can walk one behind each other. So a little bit of care is needed, particularly in urban areas. If the road speed is 30mph, then please stick to the limit. Please don't drive up the tailpipe of the person ahead of you just because *they* are trying to stick to the limit. It isn't going to kill you to take two minutes longer to get to your destination. However, if the person ahead of you stops suddenly, and you go into the back of them, then you are entirely at fault, and it will be you who might get the "Driving without Due Care and Attention" prosecution. If it is raining, your stopping distance is longer - be aware and don't go quite so fast! *You* know where you are going, you might have travelled this journey many times. However, the rest of us don't. Your psychic abilities are not as great as you think they are. So please SIGNAL when you are turning or pulling out. This includes roundabouts and lanes which have a little arrow painted on them to tell you which direction you are going in. A pedestrian waiting to cross the road ahead can't see those arrows, and doesn't know where you are going! It doesn't actually take that much energy to signal, and it will help with the heart attacks because the pedestrian who thinks you are going straight on won't step out in front of you!

I doubt anyone who actually reads this blog is guilty of any of the faults above, but after several near misses, I just had to get it off my chest!

Back again...

Well, I'm back now - three weeks 'off air', and I've been amazed at how many people have looked at my blog even when I've not been writing (between 30 and 40 a week...)! Big hello to everyone :-)

NaNoWriMo didn't go terribly well - with only 10 days to go, I've not yet hit 2,000 words... A bit of a failure all round, really! But, the story, even though not really on it's way, does still have wings (I think), and I'm hoping will get a bit further. It's turned into another teen-sci-fi story though - I seem to be incapable of writing anything that isn't teen...

However, the reasons for failure have been many:
We've suddenly had every single council in the country (or so it feels) go out to tender, needing the documentation to be back before Christmas - most of them before this coming Monday... So the stress levels are running very high, and the overtime has been piling up.
In September, I started a college course (Introductory Certificate in Supervisory Management), which got off to a dodgy start ("We will be covering the same topics as in the full certificate, but instead of doing it in 35 weeks, we will do it in 10. By the way, I've only ever taught the 35 week course..."), got worse, ("Because no-one understood the basic stuff I went through in 3 hours last week, I'll spend 1 1/2 hours going through it again this week, and only do the first page of this week's topic."), hit a major low point ("Your course tutor has gone off sick permanently."), and then picked up again with a nice new tutor ("You will get an extension on your assignment (which would have been due in next week), but I want to go through the first half with you individually *now*"). Which meant that I've had to spend the last couple of weeks writing up the first half of my assignment!
Also - we still don't have a car (until tomorrow - huzzah!), which has meant that I've lost half an hour every evening (small excuse) because I've had to walk home, rather than have John come and pick me up.

But yay - as mentioned above, we are picking up our replacement for the Punto tomorrow. It's an L Reg Toyota Carina - not the swishest car on the market, but certainly a good buy, according to Yahoo. It has been very well loved, and the current owner is going to give us the contact details of the garage owner who has been looking after it for many years (not sure if since new, but definitely since it has been in this chap's family). After a month without wheels, I've not got used to not having a car - I'm sure that this says a lot about us and our modern lifestyle. Whilst everybody we know has been amazing in giving us lifts, often coming miles out of their way (big thanks to Sarah here) to make sure that we don't miss out, and my day-to-day life hasn't been disrupted *too* badly (I walk/train to work and back - John normally picking me up from the station in the evening), the inability to jump into the car to go somewhere, even just round the corner (10 minutes drive, 30-40 minutes walk) to Sainsbury's to go shopping has been frustrating. I will be glad to be in a car again, even if the thought of getting behind the wheel of a strange car is scaring me whitless! (I wasn't too bad when using the company pool car to go home for my mother's birthday weekend, but I had driven it before, and a Ford Focus isn't hugely different from the Punto)

The other thing that I need to catch up on before I sign off for the evening (it's getting late, and I've got a long day tomorrow!) is cinema reviews. We've been to a lot of films recently, and I've not talked about any of them - slap my wrists!

Daywatch
The sequel to NightWatch, this is an adaption of a series of Russian novels. Confusingly, although the film title sequence follows the titles of the novels, DayWatch is really an amalgamation of the second and third thirds of the NightWatch novel. We saw it in Russian with subtitles, and the subs themselves were as much a work of art as the rest of the film (one particular one that sticks with me is where one character yells "Bitch" at another, whilst throwing a lump of bloody meat at her. The meat hits the tiled wall, and the blood, running down the wall, forms the "Bitch" subtitles.) The story itself is very confusing, even for me, and I had read the book recently! There are a lot of interweaving threads, a lot of characters who aren't properly introduced, and who look similar to each other (we had met some of them in the first film, but that was shown a while ago...), and the ending is just HUH? But all of that pales into insignificance when you see the beauty of the film. Whilst Moscow probably isn't the most gorgeous of cities to have as a backdrop, every scene felt like it was crafted with care. My overall impression of the film, even over a month after watching it is still "Wow!" I'm going to be putting the DVD on my wishlist :-)

Stardust
This is an adaption of Neil Gaiman's graphic novel - and, though it has been a long while (must be three or four years at least) since I read the novel, I felt that it was pretty much faithful to the story. I really enjoyed it - a pop-corn type of film without any really hard thinking needed. It had a star studded cast; Peter O'Toole making a few minute cameo, and Ian McKellan doing a front and end narration! Michelle Pfeiffer played an incredibly convincing witch, Robert De Nero, a fantastically camp pirate, and a slew of British comedians also had roles (David Walliams, Mark Williams (only he could play a goat dressed up as a man...) and even David Brent (though he, as ever, only played David Brent...)). The film hardly had any CGI, which made a nice change, the scenery used was beautiful, and there were some lovely one-liners in it, and one great sword fighting sequence. Definitely worth a look - whilst you might not come away feeling changed or have any philosophical awakenings, you'll have had a great time!

Black Sheep
This was my horror film for the next five years... I don't do gore. I don't do spatter, and I definitely don't do horror. I therefore went to see this New Zealand independant film with a mild feeling of dread and the knowledge that I was going to be hiding behind my fingers for a lot of the time. But, hey, how could I turn down a film about zombie sheep? And when this was the trailer we saw, it had to be worth a look! I was prepared that all of the best bits would have been in the trailer, as is so often the case, but I was so pleasantly suprised! It was a very funny, but definitely *very* gory film. I *did* spent a lot of time hiding behind my fingers (often at points where, I was told, there were cutaways at the final moment), but I spent even more time laughing. Very silly, sick in places, not one for young children, but a brilliant film - I hope that this team do more!

And finally...

Beowulf
This is the much advertised retelling of the Old English tale - man meets beast, man kills beast, beast's mother gets a little upset and comes to complain... I'm not going to give away too much, as this one is still in the cinemas, and I don't want to add any spoilers (particularly where the story has been changed from the original). The technique of the film is interesting - the actors were filmed, and then animated, so the entirety of the film is CGI. Unfortunately, they seem to have been hanging a lot on this technique to sell the film (much is being made of it being seen in 3D, which we weren't able to do), and the technology isn't *quite* there to pull it off (apart from the final action sequence, in which almost all sins are forgiven!) The script was ok (not fantastic, given that Neil Gaiman was writing it), the acting was good (Antony Hopkins played a great King), and there were some lovely bits (the fact that Grendel speaks in Old English - it takes a while to tune the ear to it, and I know that they would have picked the words close enough to English to be understood, but it was still a beautiful touch). However, there just seemed to be something intangible missing. Something that could have turned this from a mediocre film into a brilliant one. I do think that I'll go and revisit the book, though...

And, now that I've written almost as much as I have for the whole of my NaNoWriMo story, I am going to sign off... Hopefully, it won't be another three weeks before I write again!

Firsts...

Well, since getting married, I've managed to encounter a number of 'firsts'. I've had my first filling (discovered a hole in my tooth the hard way when trying to pick out the pip that had got stuck - the pin went right through...) I was recommended a dental surgery round the corner from us, and was pleasantly surprised to learn that they were still taking on NHS patients. I registered on the Friday, had my appointment on the Monday, and had the follow up appointment to actually have the filling the Monday after. Very impressed.

I’ve managed to lock someone into a building for the first time (locked myself out plenty of times!) – in this case, John. Our flat doors are completely key operated – they don’t slam shut behind you meaning that you lock yourself out by mistake. However, this time, I managed to take both my keys and John’s to work, and, as John is not dedicated enough to the company that sucks the life force from him, he wasn’t willing to contemplate climbing out of a window to go to work (not only that, but leaving a window open would have been an obvious temptation to burglars…

And, my very big first – I’ve had my first multiple vehicle car accident. I’ve been in a couple of cars that have had single vehicle accidents before; when I was 11, a sliding Yellow Pages meant that my father drove into a lamp post, and a couple of years ago, our bonnet flew open on the motorway, smashing the windscreen. However, this was the first when I was driving, and the first when I was alone in the car. I’m not going to beat about the bush – I was in the wrong. I was tired (the accident happened at about 9.50), I’d got lost in an unfamiliar part of Bristol, and I was not concentrating as much as I should have been. I ended up pulling out in front of someone, and hitting them on the passenger side door. Fortunately, although both myself and the driver in the other car were shaken up, neither of us were hurt at all. The cars, however, were a different matter. Whilst her car managed to get away with a dent on the passenger side, and a burst tire from where she swerved onto the pavement, our little Punto ended up with a stove-in bonnet, passenger side lights smashed, and, fatally, a broken radiator, that leaked water everywhere. The upshot of this is that the car is on the verge of being written off (we are waiting for the insurance assessor to finish his report).

The one thing that struck me about the whole thing was how many people there are who will go out of their way to help. Within a minute of the accident, a number of the householders around had come out to see if there was anything they could do. They offered advice (including what details to swop – my brain had gone into shut down, and I really didn’t know), checked that we were both ok, and one incredibly kind gentlemen (retired paramedic) offered the use of his front room whilst I was waiting for the recovery vehicle (and he was very persistent about it – I didn’t want to impose on him and his wife, particularly given that it was now half past 10, and the breakdown vehicle wasn’t going to arrive till half 11. The third time he asked, I accepted!), and brought me out a glass of water whilst I was waiting on the phone. Even the parents of the person I hit were amazing – the mother going as far as giving me a hug when I got overwrought – something you don’t expect when you have just hit their daughter’s car!

So, for the first time since we both moved to Bristol, we are car-less. It is amazing how much you rely on motor transport – neither of us cycle. The public transport round Bradley Stoke, whilst acceptable during rush hour (I get the train to work in the city centre), is appalling at weekends (the regular buses around our house stop running at 6 pm in any direction on a Saturday, and hardly anything runs on a Sunday), which makes doing the shopping very difficult (and I am incredibly reluctant to shop online. However, with delivery being £5, which is the same cost as getting the two of us to Sainsbury’s and back, I might think about it!) The hardest thing (on my part – I think John is not too happy about having to walk to work every day rather than going five minutes round the corner!) is not being able to get to orchestra – I find that I rely a lot on the relaxation that comes from playing as a group, and not being able to go, even for a couple of weeks, has left me feeling a bit empty.

But the one thing that we have not had, in the midst of all of this disruption and destruction. We have not had our first row. John has been amazing through all of this – he has not shouted, he has not sulked, and he hasn’t even blamed me. He has been upset, obviously, but he has not taken anything out on me, even though I deserve it. I couldn’t ask for a better husband.

In other news, I'm going to be taking part in NaNoWriMo - I am going to try to write a 50,000 word novel during the month of November. This means that I might not be posting as much as I should, though I'm sure I'll be able to post some story updates on here :-)

Autumn Days when the Grass is Jewelled

I am not a fan of the colder months of the year. Any month from September through to April will usually find me cuddled up under many layers of jumpers, complaining about the office heating and overdosing on coffee just to keep warm. It also finds me sullen and morose, particularly as the nights start getting longer and the rain sets in. My patience, never particularly good at the best of times, gets very low, and I get stroppy over people that I consider to be fools. In short, I'm not a happy bunny, and I'm definitely not a nice person to know.

However...

We are now over midway through October, and I've been finding myself suprisingly cheerful. I've been looking out at the crisp blue skies and looking forward to my lunch break because it means I can get outside. Even though waking up to the alarm clock is still difficult, I'm not finding waking up in the dark depressing. I've been really enjoying watching the leaves changing colours, and have particularly enjoyed the walk to and from work, where I've been finding the biggest piles of dead leaves and scuffing through them, watching them fly into the air, or crunch underfoot. (probably making far too much work for the poor street cleaners - sorry!) Yes, I'm wearing two jumpers at the moment, and my scarf and gloves have come out (no hat yet, but I'm sure that will be making an appearance in a matter of weeks), but the bundling up has made me feel warm and cosy, not down.

I'm not sure if this is all part of the a outlook on life in general, whether the cathartic post a few months ago has helped to clear more than just those old injuries, or whether married life is agreeing with me!

We shall see if this good humour continues, particularly into winter and the first snows...

Honeymoon

This is going to be a very quick post on the honeymoon, mainly because John has already blogged about it.
Norway is beautiful. The Fjords are amazing. Bergen, where we stayed, is gorgeous, both in scenery and in character - the people are so friendly, and were very kind when we tried to speak our basic guide book Norwegian.

We went on two Fjord trips, and also sightseeing within the environs of Bergen, including going up the Floybanen and the Ulrkisbanen cable cars, and going out to Grieg's house.

We also spent a heck of a lot of money - Norway isn't cheap, and we were spending the best part of £70-£100 per night on food! However, it was all definitely worth it - and I would love to go back, when I win the Lottery....

The Wedding Part III - Return of the Guests...

{EDIT} Just to say, I've only just realised that it has posted this with the date that I first started writing it in Blogger - I did only publish it Saturday night (13th...)

Final part of the trilogy now :-)

And given that it is now over a month since we got married, I really ought to get this published! (Bear with me - work has been manic, and it has been tricky to find the time to write) The photos all link through to Facebook, however you do not need to have an account to be able to see them...

We left the Westminster Suite to find that a few of our evening guests had already arrived. There was lots of chatting, quite a few photographs, and even a few tears from my aunt. It was very difficult to try to get round to speak to everyone - I really hope that I managed to, and that no-one felt like I was ignoring them. The band, Diabolus in Musica (we had Paul and David - shown at the bottom of this page of their website), once they had set themselves up, came out to play some pieces for us as we waited to be allowed back into the Westminster. They really helped to set the tone for the evening, and it was brilliant to be able to hear the tunes that I'd enjoyed from their album. Their whole performance was given in Elizabethan English - fantastic!

We also had to disappear (although I did delegate most of this to Emme) to clear our 'civvies' out of the changing bedroom and move through to our own rooms.

By the time I got back, pretty much everyone had arrived, and I was walking past the Atrium to hear John calling me through the second door. He wanted me to meet his friend Adrian, and we chatted for a bit by the Atrium bar. We were both so happy with the way the whole day had gone - "It's just been fantastic. Absolutely nothing has gone wrong!" John said, waving his arms expansively, and knocking the pint of beer standing behind him all over the bar. Fortunately, it was his father's, rather than the beer of anyone who would make a fuss...

Then the band announced that the Westminster was ready for us to go back in, and we headed through. The new layout was lovely - the long tables had been replaced by circular ones, and they had moved the runners across, added circular mirrors and put little candles everywhere. It looked magical.

Diabolus Paul (not to get him confused with Best Man Paul...) took John and myself aside to teach us a few simple steps (yes, called Simples) for our first dance. I had managed to completely forget the fact that we would have to do a first dance solo, and was a little bit nervous at this point... Fortunately the moves were very easy, and Paul told us that he would let us go round the room a few times, and would tell us through the music when it was time to stop.

So, we headed to the dance floor, and D. Paul announced that we would be doing our first dance. The music started, and we stepped forwards. At this point, for me at least, all co-ordination seemed to cease. I was juggling dress, husband and trying to concentrate on when I was stepping (and in which direction - front, left or right), and when I was doing the funny little lift... However, you would think that by the fourth or fifth time round the dance floor, I would have been able to get it right... However, it was all fun, and set the scene for the evening's entertainment.

This started by D. Paul getting as many people as possible onto the dance floor for another version of the Simples (this one including going backwards...) A very stately and genteel dance, and much enjoyed by those taking part - particularly shown by the fact that no-one really wanted to leave the dance floor when the dance was over. (and this was really notable throughout the evening - in most Ceilidhs that I have been to, the music finishes, and everyone instantly disappears to get a drink. Not only did we not lose that many people between dances, but after the dancing breaks, they all came back for more!)

Then D. Paul announced "The Horses Brawl." At this point, I couldn't stop myself grinning, because this was the dance that D.Paul had made us do in front of a Nottingham audience when we went to see them play so many months ago. Therefore we knew what everyone else was in for... Essentially, this is a dance from Tudor France. Along with the Simples steps, there is a section where, in turn, the men and women must raise their hands into hooves, paw at the ground, and turn round. It all looks very silly, particularly when the music started speeding up. But not as silly as the "Peas Brawl", where we were peas in a pod, 'popping' round the circle, or the Washerwoman's Brawl, where we had to scold each other.

In between dances, Diabolus took the time to show our guests how the hurdy gurdy worked, and generally kept everybody very much entertained. Rather amusingly, at one point, he was playing the hurdy gurdy over the pram of little Guy Sidney, at that point just over a month old. The son of our orchestra conductor and lead cellist was so used to music that he didn't even stir.

Whilst the music was playing, the Tortworth staff had also brought out the evening buffet, complete with fantastic butterscotch choux pastries (the only thing I could eat all evening - my adrenalin was still running high!) The cheese cake was also available for people to eat, though they didn't have nearly enough (we ended up with a shelf and a half full of cheese in the freezer afterwards!)

The evening really went by in a bit of a blur. Talking to family and friends, dancing, and just generally looking round at everyone enjoying themselves.

11 came round far too quickly, and Diabolus played their last piece. This was not a dance in itself, but a story in song - the story of Brave Sir Eglemont and the Dragon - acted out by guests Bruce (Sir Eglemont) and Jayne (the Dragon), and the chorus being provided by the audience. It was very silly, and great fun!

Then Diabolus left, and the guests started to leave too. Quite a few, however, stayed until 1, when the Tortworth staff rather plaintively asked us to leave, as they had to reset the room for a conference the next morning. Whilst most people went to bed, a few of us (including my brothers) ended up in the guest bar for one last drink before retiring. We ended up in bed at about 2 in the morning - the room provided for us by Tortworth was room number 1, which looked out over the gargoyles which guarded the entrance to the hotel. They'd also very kindly given us a bottle of champagne and a box of chocolates (both of which we took home rather than consuming then and there!)

And that is the story of the wedding, in all of its glory and detail...

Sorry that it has taken so long to get it posted, and well done if you managed to get to the end!
(I will now go back through the previous posts and link some more photos...)

A Married Couple's Wish

This was part of the text of my father's speech - I loved it so much that I wanted to share:

A married couple’s wish

Give me the Grace to accept that on occasions I will irritate my spouse,
In what I do or say;
With my catch-phrases, my hygiene habits, or how I like things done;
In the same way that they in turn will get on my nerves from time-to-time.

Give me the Understanding to realise that just as I have “off” days when I am tired and grouchy,
I cannot expect them to be 100% sunny all day every day,
And help me make allowances for that.

Grant me the Courage to raise the truly significant irritations with them,
And not just grind my teeth in mute and impotent frustration.
But grant me too the Wisdom to know the right time to broach the subject,
And the least hurtful way to ask that they change their ways.

Above all, help me to remember that I am not perfect,
But show me how I can learn, so that I improve with age.

(c) Nigel Foster September 2007